How to create curved labels for cylinder chart

Hello Excel friends,
I have this chart using cylinders and need to place a label on each. Since the cylinders are (virtually) round, I'd like the labels to curve around rather than remain flat.
Anybody got an idea how I might do that?
Thanks!
CylinderChart.png

Thanks Andy - while I didn't really know exactly what you meant by TRUE SHAPES, it did motivate me to experiment.
I went to Insert > WordArt and found a means to curve the text so that it kinda resembles text wrapping around the cylinder.
I appreciate your assistance. While I only see the ATTACH code, I hope the image appears online.
Attachment 660611